Wow. Like Andrew's post it has been a really long time since I've updated. Part of it was due to lack of internet and the other part is just lazyness. So I guess it's time to be unlazy. Right now I am laying in bed and just turned on The Chronicles of Narnia to watch. I'm really excited, I've been thinking about this movie lately.
Where to start, the last thing you knew was that there was a dance party to go to. I went. It was a lot of fun and I took a lot of pictures (you can find them on Facebook). After that classes continued on and then I worked at lame-ass Cold Stone. The following weekend was the InterVarsity Chapter Retreat! I love retreats. They get you started on your Jesus high that lets you go from there. The trip up there was great. I had a car of 4 girls. So naturally, it was hectic. We got lost (following Doug and Justin though!) and then finally made it there. One word to describe this retreat: revealing.
I use the word revealing because there were a lot of things revealed to me. One. God speaks to me through Spanish. I used my Spanish Bible a lot while I was there and it just started clicking. Two. I don't know my name. If you were there you'll understand that. Three. I am broken. I am trying to find my way and understand what that means. I know that I am in need of God and Jesus so much that it hurts. My life is anything but perfect, and I need to learn that in order to help with that, Jesus needs to be the center of that help. Four. I am a judge. I am constantly judging people. But luckily, God is constantly slapping me in the face and telling me I'm wrong. I would say that this weekend I made some good friends, with the new people and with people I've known since last year.
It was extremely weird walking back into that place. I have grown so much since last year, and shrunk a little, too. Being a small group leader was really weird because I now know what it feels like to be on both sides. I really enjoyed my small group. Ashley was my co-leader and I feel so much more connected to her (you'll find out why in a little bit). That's actually what my picture is; my small group. Just kidding. It won't load.
Saturday night we had a time for extended worship and a time to pray and think. There were a few people in the back: Shane, Dawn, Jeremy, Ashley, Jessica, Doug, and Dani. I first went back and talked with Ashley. I talked about what was going on with me and then she prayed for me. I can't tell you how great it is to have someone pray for you. To hear them ask God to help you. Its truly amazing. After that I chair hopped on over to Jessica. We talked and then she too prayed for me. Again an amazing feeling. After I was finished with her, I went to Dani's chair. I was actually quite nervous about that because Dani and I had only recently started talking. We talked about STIM next year and all the great things that are going to happen. Then she prayed for me. I think that just really showed how much I don't know about people, and how much I let judgements get in my way.
Afterwards we had the bonfire, and the best part of that was that we had a GIANT massage line. It was just amazing. I got massages from so many people and gave them too. Doug wins for guys and Nicole wins for girls. They were good. This weekend was also a great time to talk with Doug and Tyler. We had great conversations sitting in the woods and talking with them was where I could open up and talk about anything. Great friendships are forming.
Sometimes I'm a douchebag. For some reason, I decide that I'm not going to call someone to hang out until they call me first. I think God is telling me that that's pretty stupid. I have run into said person every day this week. I think it's an insult to the friendship that I have and I need to stop.
What I really liked about the retreat was when Dani gave her talk about identity, and who she is. We were all given nametags for us to think about what our names are. I still don't know, but I wrote some things down. I think it's a process to figure it out and can't be thought of on the spot.
¿A dónde voy con mi vida? = Where am I going with my life?
My plan when I'm done with school is to head overseas somewhere to teach English. Maybe in Latin America or Spain. I don't want to leave behind my friends. But I guess if they are meant to be in my life in the future, God will keep them there. It's just really nerve racking becuase I'm very selfish when it comes to that and refuse to say goodbye.
Tonight I had dinner with one of the guys from my small group. It was fun, he's cool and we share the same name and cell phone actually. I look forward to getting to know him better. Tomorrow I'm getting lunch with another one of the guys and that too should be fun.
Well I'm exhausted so it's off to bed I go.
Also. Yay for an interview at the coffee shop and hopefully telling Cold Stone to fuck off.
PEACE
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