Slightly Confused

Good evening my loyal readers. I'm laying here in bed and I'm confused. A little history lesson. Last year when I started working at Cold Stone, I met Jamie. She was hired after me and I thought she was very pretty and funny so we started talking. We went out and hung out a bit. It was fun, it was really cool getting to know her. We talked all the time and she used to call me and it was really good. However, after I left and went to Blacksburg and then Rockbridge I didn't hear from her. I assumed that it was "Out of sight, out of mind." So I went on with the summer and didn't really think about her.

I knew that when I started working at Cold Stone again that I would see her, but I wasn't really interested in pursuing anything with her. However, I got a phone call tonight from her and we were talking like we did before I left. It was really good to hear from her and talk. She mentioned that she has a boyfriend now, but it makes me wonder as to why she would call and talk to me for a good chunk of time. I know that friends call each other, but we were never really friends. So I guess some feelings I thought were dead came back and are plaguing me. I guess I don't really know how I should feel. We're completely different people and our views on a lot of things are different.

Last year when I was talking to her, my friend told me to be careful and to not cross a line. The more I think about it, the more I'm starting to realize how correct he was. There are lines that shouldn't be crossed. I guess as I'm still figuring out my own thoughts on everything and still adjusting to my life with Christ. Sex before marriage has always been something that I've never really thought was a big deal. A lot of my friends are having sex and it doens't bother me. At first it's a slight shock, but it doesn't bother me. I guess I don't know how sex changes you, but I've been told it does. I don't know how it would alter me mentally, but I think I've come to the conclusion that I don't want to abuse something that important and detremental to your soul. Having sex with the wrong person could affect you in ways that you don't know. Waiting until you're married and truly in love is when sex is meant to be, or at least that's how I feel.

Sorry that this turned into a discussion on sex, but I guess after talking to Jamie again, it's been on my mind. I don't judge people who have sex, I feel that it's their choice, but I guess I've made my own personal choice.

Well, I don't have anything to do tomorrow, so I'm going to sleep in and figure out what to do when I awake.

PEACE